10 Things I Quit Doing in 2018

Working for money. This is a bigger deal than it sounds because what it means is that I disentangled my ego from how much money I make. Now the U.S. Government has set my value with its incredibly generous Social Security benefits.

Waiting for somebody else to carry stuff. I schlep an enormous amount of stuff between Time of the Month Club and Street Angels and I like it, I don’t know why. Five years ago, I’d be looking for a man or a donkey to haul all these bags and boxes but no more, man, I am my own hauler.

Wearing pants that aren’t jeans. I take that back. I wore a wild pair of gold and brown flowing pants to a reception during the summer. They were nice but felt like pajamas. There’s a reason why Levis are timeless.

Eschewing the phone. A big dose of ‘get over yourself’ came hurling at me from Mars one day and I fired up the phone attachment for my cochlear implant and called the damn dentist. Big breakthrough, folks. You have no idea.

Putting up with hijackers. If I own the plane and I am flying the plane, the plane is going where I want it to go. When you own the plane and fly the plane, you can go where you want to go. Meanwhile, take a seat in the back.

Buying stuff. I am done with stuff. My house is full of stuff. I don’t even like buying stuff for other people who haven’t had the time I’ve had to accumulate a lot of stuff. I’m really sick to death of stuff. This makes me not a great Christmas present giver.

Indulging timidity. My patience for people who don’t ‘want to make waves’ has vanished. At the same time, my admiration for people who call out injustice, hypocrisy, and all kinds of ridiculousness has soared. And, yeah, I decided to go with the cool kids.

Drinking wine all night. I was never a drunk but I could always drink a fair amount. Let’s just say – I’m a shadow of my former self.

Trying to control the relationships of others. I say this as old dog and new dog bark and nip at each other. ‘They will work it out,’ we were told and so they will. But it is a pain to listen to and not just with dogs.

Holding back. I don’t, anymore.

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