Red's Wrap
Happiness. It's relative.
Now I Know
A few years ago, we took our granddaughter camping. It rained all night, thundered with lightening strikes, and in the morning everything was soaked but the day was bright and clear.
We went hiking up a trail to a lookout where we could see all of Devil’s Lake. In my mind’s eye, I could imagine swimming across it. And I right away wanted to go down the hill to the lake to swim.
Of course, when we got there the shore was full of people. It was a vast, shallow lake and a favorite for families especially those with little kids. I took my granddaughter’s hand, she was about eight then, and we waded into the water.
“Look at all the little fish!” I said. A school of baby fish weaved through our legs, tiny slivers of silver grazing our legs, tickling us. It made me happy to see the fish. It was magical. “Put your hands in the water, maybe we can catch one.”
The fish swam away and my granddaughter yelled, “I want to get out!” “I want to get out now!”
So I pulled her out deeper, thinking that if we got out of the shallows where the little fish were skittering about, she would throw herself into swimming and we could have a good time. We had done that before. Swum and jumped, dodged and ducked. It was something we had always done together.
“I can’t stay here!” “I have to get out!” Now she was screaming as loud as she could. Other swimmers stood up in the water to look at her. People on shore stopped what they were doing. It was alarming, hearing her scream so loud. I tried to hug her, pull her up out of the water but it didn’t do any good. She just kept screaming.
It was unbelievable to me.
I smoothed the hair out of her eyes and tried to get her to stop screaming and look at me. “We’ve gone swimming in lakes before. They all have fish, honey.”
“But I didn’t know the fish were there. Now I know.”
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Snow Door | wisconsinacademy.org
Listen to Jan read her essay “Billy” presented on WUWM’s Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “At the Breakfast Bar” on WUWM Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “The Parish Hall,” on WUWM Lake Effect
“Fury Cannot Touch Me,” Modern Love, NYT, 9/29/11
Grandkids are a truth serum.
Reblogged this on Red's Wrap and commented:
A profound little lesson – knowledge isn’t always power, sometimes it’s incapacitating.
Interesting message.
I read this one aloud to my husband, Jan. Reminds me of when our kids were little. My husband and I both enjoy being outside, hiking, canoeing, kayaking, swimming in lakes, camping but our daughters never took to it. The fish lurking below the surface was always as source of fear. Sometimes it really is best not to know so you can enjoy it for what it looks like on the surface. Wonderful post.
Oh, a metaphor for life. Beautifully done.
A loss of innocence.
The moment of truth