A Talking To

Get rid of those scarves. You’re never going to wear them.

Huh? Who are you?

I’m your Fashionista! Your fashion sense.

What are you talking about? I don’t have any fashion sense.

My point exactly. You need me to tell you to ditch those stupid scarves.

What if I want to add color and excitement and verve to my look?

Yeah. I’ve seen you try. You wrap a twenty-foot scarf around your neck like it’s a python and then rip it off panting for air.

Other women wear scarves and they look great.

Maybe you need a longer neck because you always look like one of those ancient turtles on its way to lay eggs at the Galapagos.

That’s harsh.

I know, I’m so sorry. But it’s my job to protect you from being a laughingstock.

A laughingstock! You think wearing a scarf makes me a laughingstock? That’s terrible. What about all the times I’ve worn scarves in the past?

People are still laughing.

I guess I should thank you for your honesty but I don’t feel all that appreciative.

That’s okay. I totally understand. Now should we pack these up or leave them hanging here so you can remember all the good times?

9 thoughts on “A Talking To

  1. Paula Lucey

    need to think of some social justice use for all of them, then there would be a massive collection! Maybe some quilters group would make them into blankets or something. I have an entire drawer including seasonal and holiday themed ones. Some expensive, some gifts and some with fringe.


  2. I too have scarves. I don’t think I’ve ever bought one, but they seem to arrive.

    Since I have no talent for looking good in them — I either look like a Ukranian grandmother or as if I’m being strangled — I drape them over lamps, hang them on miscellaneous hooks in the bedroom. I tie them to the handles of my tall dresser where they add color and occasionally get trapped in the drawers. At least they don’t strangle me.

    Besides, they are silk. How can I get rid of them? Besides, someone will give me more for my birthday or Christmas because that’s what people do when they have no idea what to give me.

    They do look pretty draped over small lamps.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I have a drawer full of scarves. I love scarves. But now I live in Arizona where it is hot AND I almost never get dressed up, so I don’t wear scarves much. But I can’t bear to part with them . . . . I say keep your scarves. Maybe we will do crafts with them one day.

    Liked by 1 person

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